Since the only way to judge who to vote for, in the DR, is to look at their pictures, which are plastered all over the place, I was thinking of that instead of the "Change" slogans that are under every picture, something more honest might be more interesting.
Here are some suggestions:
Vote for me. I will steal less than my opponent.
Yes my Party is mostly thieves, bums, and crooks, but I am new at this.
50% of what I steal I will share with the voters, if you can prove you voted for me.
I have a small family. How many worthless relatives can I give high paying jobs?
I have never been in jail. Well, not for a political crime, anyway.
I will bring "junketing" to a new level.
I will not knock up any more minors. (One candidate knocked up two girls under 16)
I will accept narco dollars only when ABSOLUTELY necessary.
If he wins, you're fucked. If I win you are screwed. The choice is yours.
I will only sell my two new car tax exemptions to people who deserve to be seen driving around like royalty.
If the candidates really wanted to be honest, they could make this a really interesting campaign.
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